A Step Backwards
As recent events demonstrate, Human Progress is inconsistent...
People evolve in fits and starts and starts and fits and either way it would be nice to believe the Human Race is slowly improving and there are times it does seem like we’re making progress.
For instance: dumb fads like streaking, break dancing, pet rocks, mood rings and leisure suits are no longer popular, but we lost hot pants and mini-skirts along the way — two of my favorite fashion statements and both statements seemed to be “look at my ass” — so Longfellow was right, into each life some rain must fall and while we’re on the subject: y’know what Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s porn name was?
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
According to the internet, your porn name is the name of your first pet and the street you grew up on which would make mine “Chief Aguilar” which is actually pretty cool and I’m going to start using it immediately.
Wait…I’ve got three brothers, so that would be their porn names too, which sounds pretty confusing. Let me think about it and get back to you.
And now that we don’t have that settled…
Our attitudes toward homosexuality and mixed-race couples and Black dudes playing Big League Baseball have improved considerably although we haven’t all improved at the same rate and according to this BBC article there are 64 countries where it’s still illegal to be gay:
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-43822234
Couple things about that:
If it’s illegal to be gay and have gay sex and you get caught breaking that Don’t Have Gay Sex Law you could be sent to prison where there’s at least some chance you’ll be forced to have gay sex so I’m not sure they’ve thought that punishment all the way through.
Also, some of the most strident anti-gay people eventually get caught having gay sex in men’s restrooms so it seems pretty likely they have some unresolved issues about their own sexuality and I don’t see how two (or more…I’m open-minded) people I don’t know having sex I’m unaware of affects me, so it’s not something I worry about.
As John Lennon and Elton John once sang, “Whatever gets you thru the night” and if you haven’t heard that song here it is:
According to the same BBC article there’s trend toward decriminalizing same-sex acts so that’s hopeful, but then we take a giant-ass step backwards and suddenly antisemitism is more common.
But I’m guessing for a lot of that antisemitism we’re now seeing was always there under the surface and now those antisemitic people are letting it out because they see others doing it and think maybe it’s OK to once again be an asshole.
An unfortunate number of people seem willing to base their lives on what they see others doing and getting away with and in my opinion one of the very worst things about Donald Trump (including encouraging architecturally-unstable comb-overs) is people seeing him deny science, election results and reality in general and thinking it’s OK to do the same thing.
“The Boy Stood on the Burning Deck” is a line from a poem called Casabianca written by Felicia Dorothea Hemans in 1826 while she was killing time waiting for Heathcliff to walk across the moors and show up at her Wuthering Heights Condominiums and about half that is true so at least on this occasion I’m doing much better than some critics might think.
The poem is based on a true event about a boy who stood on a burning deck waiting for his father’s order to abandon ship, but his father was already dead so the order never came and I think this is a good time to inform you that ignoring requests from people who then turn up dead is A-OK because they’re never going to know you didn’t carry out those inconvenient requests.
And in my case that means I probably won’t get the Viking funeral I’ve asked for.
Although, to be totally fair, on a variety of occasions I have requested:
To be dressed as Superman and shot out of a cannon off the top of City Hall so however briefly witnesses could believe in Super Heroes as I tumble across the sky…
To have my right arm attached to a motor that allows me to wave and if mechanically feasible, high-five funeral attendees…
And if at all possible to have at least a half-dozen scantily-clad strippers and prostitutes throw themselves on my coffin and wail with misery while pretending to be heartbroken so everyone in attendance will think I led a much more exciting life than I actually did.
If done in the right order all four requests are possible and let’s face it, that would be the most entertaining funeral you ever attended and it’s almost enough to make me look forward to the event.
And now back to Casabianca.
According to the internet the poem became a standard lesson shoved down British and American kids’ throats from 1850 to about 1950 and it sounds like the lesson they wanted gullible kids to learn is this was an example of obedience and loyalty they should emulate, which is a slightly different lesson than the one I take away from it, which is:
Blind obedience and failing to think for yourself is a great way to get burned alive on a ship’s deck, form the Nazi Party or wind up in prison when some narcissistic Reality Show Demagogue suggests you take the day off and overthrow the government. And yet…as the cartoon indicates…too many Republicans continue to stand on Donald Trump’s burning deck.
(It also helps to know “dreck” is a Yiddish word meaning: “anything regarded as worthless or of low quality; junk.”)
As I’ve noted before and hope to again: Donald Trump has never won the popular vote in an election and by endorsing a series of Extremist Halfwits (based entirely on their willingness to kiss his ass) has led the Republican Party to an impressive string of defeats because when everybody gets to vote in a general election the people who aren’t Extremist Halfwits tend to reject those who are.
Although Marjorie Taylor Greene demonstrates this is not a 100% sure thing.
And now a word about the word “Republicans”
When I (or any other political cartoonist) use the words “Republicans” or “Democrats” we’re well aware all Republicans and Democrats don’t think exactly alike, but “72% of Republicans” won’t fit on a cartoon label, so we usually mean the majority of Republicans or Democrats and count on readers to understand that, which doesn’t always happen.
I think it’s fair to point out there are numerous sane Republicans who have criticized Donald Trump, what’s he’s done and doing and this comes from Republican Adam Kinzinger:
"The militant, intolerant ideologies, the militias, the alienation and the disaffection, the weird fantasies and disinformation, they're all still out there ready to go. That's the elephant in the room."
And Republican Liz Cheney:
"We have a threat domestically. We have a former president trying to unravel democracy. The problem is not just Donald Trump. The problem is people who deny election outcomes."
The following is from Wikipedia so believe it or don’t and if you don’t like it you can always go change it if you can summon up the anger and the energy, but there’s a page listing the Republicans who oppose Donald Trump’s 2024 presidential campaign and it includes:
1 former Republican President
2 former Republican Vice presidents
12 former Republican Cabinet-level officials
17 current or former Republican U.S. Senators
31 current or former Republican U.S. Representatives
And a partridge in a pear tree.
A Republican Representative named Ken Buck (R-Colorado) warned his colleagues that Trump’s lies and lawlessness will lead Republicans to defeat in next year’s presidential contest and while I don’t know if that’s true because Joe Biden isn’t exactly Mr. Excitement, there are Republicans who understand the danger Donald Trump represents and have decided to jump the hell off that burning deck and swim for shore.
Yet another Trump Critic
“It’s the phoniness of it all. It’s the phoniness and this cruelty. Donald is cruel.”
“All he wants to do is appeal to his base. He has no principles. None. None. And his base, my God, if you were a religious person, you want to help people. Not do this.”
If you’re thinking, “Oh, great another Tree-Hugging Trump Hater” those quotes came from Maryanne Trump Barry, federal judge and Donald Trump’s sister. Unfortunately, the quotes came from her obituary so there’s one less Trump Critic on the planet, but the way he’s going I’m sure he’ll create more.
A common complaint about political campaigns is that they’re far too negative and former presidential candidate Tim Scott made the mistake of believing Americans would support a positive campaign and the only positive thing that came out of it is I’m positive Tim Scott will never be president.
According to the internet, Scott never broke 4% in national polls.
OK, once again that’s it for now and I have to stop writing because I need to think of today’s cartoon, but I promise you’ll hear from me soon whether you want to or not.
Sincerely,
Chief Aguilar
Just here to declare my porn name…
Piper Claremont… sounds like niche work.
Thanks for keeping me from that cigarette with my coffee here. Progress?