Some of us have natural immunity...
According to stories that appeared pretty much everywhere, about 73 percent of Americans are now immune to the Omicron variant and whenever you hear a statistic like that you might want to ask yourself what Emergency Room nurse helped the news media pull that number directly out of its ass because you know 100 percent of Americans were not interviewed or tested so 73 percent is an estimate and according to an Associated Press story the statistic comes from an “influential model” and since there was no more information about that source feel free to imagine the “influential model” was Kendall Jenner.
And I only throw her name out there because I kind of recognized it and when I looked up an internet list of the World’s Most Famous Models number one was Pierinna Patino whom I’ve never heard of, but looks like this:
More my fault than hers and that’s probably because I stopped keeping track of fashion models somewhere around Christie Brinkley who is 68 years old, but still looks like this:
And before we say Pierinna is now a bigger deal than Christie, maybe we ought to check back and see what Ms. Patino looks like in four-and-a-half decades.
I no longer pay attention to smoking hot women of a certain age because at some point (unless a man is completely delusional and the number of comb-overs and inappropriate pickup lines would indicate that’s not an insignificant number) men need to accept that younger women are no longer attracted to them and they should focus on more age-appropriate women and that was brought home to me some years back when I was standing in line at a restaurant, waiting to order a sandwich, turned around and saw a stunningly beautiful high-school age girl and my first thought was:
“I wonder what her mom looks like.”
A thought that indicated I’ve reached a depressing level of maturity.
Anyway…
I used the “73 percent of Americans are now immune” news to make a comment about people who still believe COVID is not real and that the vaccine will make you grow horns and a tail or turn you into a magnet and I’m guessing a number of men with bad toupees, gold chains and chest hair that are far too visible are somewhat pissed off to find out the vaccine does not turn you into a “chick magnet.”
As you might have already noticed, there are a lot of dopes and nutjubs out there and even though he’s not an American, you can’t do much better than this next guy.
According to a Washington Post story, Novak Djokovic – the tennis star who was not allowed to play in Australia because he refused to get vaccinated and was short at least one vowel – had this to say about protecting your health:
“I know some people that through that energetical transformation, through the power of prayer, through the power of gratitude, they ,managed to turn the most toxic food or maybe most polluted water into the most healing water, because water reacts…molecules in the water react to our emotions, to what is being said.”
Djokovic also believes we have the power of telepathy, which according to him is a gift from “this higher order, the source, the god, whatever” so I’m guessing Novak won’t be performing brain surgery any time soon, but with beliefs like that at the very least we ought to make Djokovic an Honorary American so he can vote for Donald Trump in the next election because you know he wants to so why not let him, but require that Novak register his vote by telepathy.
Last week marked the fourth anniversary of the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shooting in which 14 students and three teachers died and when you have so many school shootings you can’t keep them straight maybe things have gotten slightly out of hand.
Why so many school shootings?
It’s my personal belief that dumb people see another dumb person do something spectacularly stupid and then think, “Why don’t I hijack a plane to Cuba?” which is kinda like thinking, “Why don’t I break into prison?” and according to this Wikipedia article it happened a lot back in the 1960s and the great thing about looking up stuff on Wikipedia is if you don’t like what you find there, you can change it.
Here’s that hijacking link:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Cuba%E2%80%93United_States_aircraft_hijackings
I can’t remember who the famous person was (I seem to recall he was an actor), but his buddies thought it was hilarious to get on Wikipedia and add made-up facts about their famous friend like in his youth he was a bullfighter who survived a serious goring in Madrid, Spain or he was head scout for Jack Black Pershing’s expedition into Mexico to hunt down Pancho Villa and I just made both those up, but it’s the kind of thing I hope you guys add to my Wikipedia entry assuming I ever get around to creating one. Although, creating your own Wikipedia entry is like giving yourself a nickname; if someone else doesn’t do it for you, then you don’t deserve one.
(Just looked it up and the closest Wikipedia entry is for Thomas Lee Judge, who was the 18th governor of Montana, so feel free to go to his entry and add the fact that he once got hit in the left kidney by a 92-MPH slider.)
Anyway…
After every school shooting politicians promise to do something this time and then wait for us to get distracted by Must-See TV or a 2-for-1 Whopper offer at Burger King.
Survivors of the shooting said they are disappointed in Joe Biden’s lack of action on gun control and I decided to contrast our inaction on violence in our country with our great concern about violence in the Ukraine.
Now here’s an article about Joe Biden and gun control:
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-60378477
When the Black Lives Matter protests were happening they were widely criticized by Republicans even though the protests were mostly peaceful and here’s an article about Republicans trying to make it more difficult for people to protest:
But now Republicans are applauding the Trucker Protests and come to think of it they weren’t too upset about the January 6th insurrection either, so apparently it’s OK for White people to protest, but it’s bad when Black people do the same thing which made them targets of the above cartoon pointing out their hypocrisy and here’s an article about that:
On the other hand…
You could say Democrats are just as hypocritical because they supported Black Lives Matter protests and now oppose the Trucker Protests and if you’d like to see a cartoon saying that, learn to draw.
When people suggest cartoon ideas, 99 times out of 100 their ideas are way too complicated because political cartoons are great at making one point at a time and this time I pointed out the Republican hypocrisy because that’s what’s going on right now, which doesn’t mean I won’t criticize Democrats and if you want proof, here are links to some of my anti-Democrat cartoons:
(Jesus…way too many links today, but you’re not going to click on them anyway so feel free to skip them and try to enjoy the rest of the article.)
Trust me, when you’ve got a deadline breathing down your neck and you’re desperate for an idea, you’ll criticize your own mother, which reminds me that my mother finally confessed that while we were growing up my brothers were setting fire to things and seeing what happened when you put a fork into a plugged-in toaster and I seemed OK because I was always reading a book or drawing a picture so she ignored me.
So if I’ve got an insecurity complex and constantly need a attention (which I do and do) I think we should both blame my mother even though I haven’t lived with her since I was 18 years old and have had five decades to correct my personality flaws, but would rather blame somebody else for something that happened when I was in third grade and still haven’t gotten over it.
OK, I was going to post a cartoon about Whoopi Goldberg’s comments, but that’s going to take some explaining and might end what little career I have left so I’ll climb out on that shaky limb another day because this thing is already too long as it is.
And on that note: have a nice weekend.