The Republicans warn us about Joe Biden

So I’m reading about the Republican National Convention and find out they’re calling Joe Biden “dangerous.” Like Joe’s going to land in your backyard in a black helicopter, take away your guns, force you to listen to rap music and give you an involuntary sex change while he’s at it.

The cartoon above is my reaction to the charge against Biden.

The claims about Biden remind me of some of the things said about Barack Obama. When he was running for president, we were told Obama was a socialist and we might as well move to Russia if we voted for him. When he and Michelle did a knuckle bump in public, a hyperventilating Fox News anchor told us it just might be a “terrorist fist jab.”

Obama may have played pickup basketball instead of golf and played Al Green at White House parties instead of Charlie Daniels, but he also seemed like the kind of guy who would have a crease pressed into his jeans.

He wasn’t nearly as radical as his opponents claimed he was.

Obama was president for eight years and as far as I recall he didn’t confiscate everybody’s guns, we weren’t forced to attend reeducation camps and cats did not marry dogs. (I also don’t recall a bunch of his associates being indicted for crimes, but that’s another column to be written another day.)

Just in case you haven’t been paying attention, here’s the deal on politics:

When someone is running for office they’ll exaggerate the dangers of electing the other candidate and exaggerate all the great things they’ll do if you vote for them; neither one tends to be 100 percent true.

Obama was not a socialist and we still don’t have a border wall paid for by Mexico.

If Joe Biden is elected we’re more likely to be forced to listen to random, incoherent stories about his career as a lifeguard than become a Socialist state. The danger Joe Biden presents has been greatly exaggerated.

On the other hand…

Donald Trump’s reaction to the COVID-19 pandemic has been an all-out, gold-plated disaster. He tried to ignore the coronavirus, downplayed its danger, offered up false claims for miracle cures, encouraged states to reopen too soon and still hasn’t issued a mask mandate or promoted social distancing.

All of which has led to the fix we’re in.

I’m not a huge Joe Biden fan, but you play the cards you’re dealt. Elect Joe Biden and it’s very unlikely that we’ll all have to memorize the sayings of Chairman Mao; re-elect Donald Trump and you’re giving him a chance to help kill another 176,000 Americans.

And that’s no exaggeration.

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