Upon Reflection

So Donald Trump decides he’s going to “fix” the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool and have the bottom painted “American flag blue”—a dark navy blue—and it costs $14 million to get the job done (a no-bid contract given to one of Trump’s associates) but after they refill the Reflecting Pool with water from the “often-fetid Tidal Basin,” the darker color elevates the water temperature, which helps algae grow and turns the Reflecting Pool puke green.

Which might seem bad, but for my money, nothing says “America” like ignorance about science and pork barrel-inspired “patriotic” projects that go horribly wrong and become a national embarrassment.

The Associated Press spoke to the president of The Pool Service Company in Arlington, Virginia—Cochise Wanzer II—and Cochise said:

“What do you expect? You’re basically taking untreated, natural river water, pumping it in and expecting it to do something different from what it would do out in the open.”

And now I’m also pissed off because that AP article made me realize I could have named at least one of my kid’s “Cochise Judge” but missed that opportunity because I wanted them to have names that wouldn’t make them targets of pre-school ridicule. (Kids can be meaner than shit and the only people who don’t think so tend not to have any.) Plus the Wanzer Family apparently has two Cochises and my family doesn’t even have one.

And if that’s not reverse discrimination I don’t know what is and clearly, I don’t know what is.

The AP article also interviewed a couple of MAGA Republics who, while dressed like American flags, posed for pictures by our new Lincoln Memorial Cesspool and attempting to look on the bright side, the female half of the Right-Wing couple watched maintenance men working on the algae problem and said:

“Look, it’s already looking more blue.”

Let’s hope we can say the same about the 2028 election night maps.

But Wait, It Gets Worse

Next they decide to clean up the algae by pouring hydrogen peroxide into the water and using “nanobubble ozone technology” (which sounds like a totally bullshit term, but according to the internet, describes pumping ozone gas bubbles into liquids and the bubbles are so fine you can’t even see them and if you’re a well-to-do emperor in need of a new wardrobe, they’ll make you a nice 3-piece suit out of them).

They also manually vacuumed the bottom of the Reflecting Pool, which in the Trump Administration’s case probably means the got some guy named “Manual” to do it and then immediately deported him before paying him.

All of which resulted in some big-ass strips of that American Flag Blue paint coming off the bottom and floating around the Reflecting Pool.

So now Trump really really really needed a scapegoat and claimed without evidence (SOP) that the Reflecting Pool problems are the result of unpatriotic vandals who have been arrested and face years in prison and when news organizations contacted the police and ask who got arrested, the police said we don’t want to talk about it.

But an accused vandal who is talking about it, is 67-year-old David Carter Hearn—a three-time Olympian canoeist—who was on a 50-mile bike ride and says he stopped by the Reflecting Pool to take a look at Trump’s Latest Fuck-Up (apparently it’s become an even more popular tourist attraction since Trump got involved) and Hearn made the mistake of reaching into the water to feel one of those strips of blue paint floating around (he says it felt “rubbery”). And for this heinous act of vandalism Hearn got arrested by the U.S. Park Police and accused of destroying government property, a crime which could get him 10 years in jail.

Y’know what won’t get you 10 years in jail?

Being found guilty of 34 felonies for falsifying business records.

The Story Gets Weirder

So now I’m reading every story about the Reflecting Pool because I’ve got a couple cartoons based on it, but the story keeps changing like a third-grader who is explaining how a dog ate his homework and because you seem unconvinced by the ravenous dog tale, throws in Time-Traveling Aliens and an American Eagle carrying a snake who says “Don’t Tread on Me.” (And if you’re thinking snakes can’t talk, jokes on you: I just saw Ted Cruz give an interview.)

Anyway…

The more details the Trump Administration provides, the more questions they raise.

Because suddenly they’re talking about a Reflecting Pool liner, not paint and without evidence (once again, SOP) Trump claims un-American saboteurs used a box cutter to make a big slice in the previously undisclosed pool liner. Yet another story suggests there is paint and a liner, but if there is a liner wouldn’t that cover up the American Flag Blue paint Trump bragged about?

Then Trump says there never was paint, it was always a liner.

Then it’s revealed that Trump drove his motorcade through the Reflecting Pool after it was painted (and possibly lined…or lined with paint) but before they put water back in the Pool and Trump was there to inspect the project’s progress which is kind of like walking through wet cement to see how your new patio is coming along.

There is now speculation that Trump’s motorcade added to or caused the damage.

Slights, Action, No Cameras

In what appears to be another “Quick, look over there!” move, the Trump Administration announces they’re putting up security cameras just in case Boris and Natasha Badenov return with their box cutters and if you don’t know who they are, you obviously didn’t watch enough Rocky & Bullwinkle cartoons when you were a kid and, man, Boris really outkicked his coverage, didn’t he?

Natasha was hot and Boris had a unibrow.

But then I seemed to remember the Reflecting Pool already had security cameras so I Google that and here’s what Google tells me:

“Yes. There were already surveillance cameras operating at the site 24/7 for years prior to the algae bloom. The National Park Service maintained cameras above the site, and the Washington Monument also has views covering the area.”

Google adds that the new cameras are “additional high-tech artificial intelligence” security cameras because apparently the old “low-tech human intelligence” security cameras couldn’t take pictures of what sounds like a team of saboteurs cutting and slicing the Reflecting Pool liner—Trump originally said the slice was 100 feet long, then said it was 200 feet, then 250 feet and now 350 feet long, which you’d think cameras might notice—and if they had those pictures of un-American saboteurs you’d think they’d show them to us.

Who Wants to Jump On This Political Hand Grenade?

So the story keeps changing and nobody is willing to go on record with anything but vague claims, but yesterday the Associated Press reported that a National Park Service official has claimed the Reflecting Pool liner was cut by a sharp knife or razor which damaged the “foam sealant” (so now there’s paint, a liner and foam sealant) but his statement did not say when the damage occurred or whether it was vandalism or who might have been involved.

The Park Service official—future Presidential Medal of Freedom winner, Frank Lands—said the damage to the Pool included “caulk over the foam sealant” that was cut (so now we have paint, a liner, foam sealant and caulk, give it a couple more days and we may have a Partridge in a Pear Tree) and while the vandals were at it, they threw “about 70 fence post tops” into the pool.

Man.

Sounds like a lot of activity which went unrecorded by the existing security cameras, so they probably used the same security cameras that didn’t record Jeffrey Epstein’s suicide. Trump claimed six people have been arrested, the Interior Department said it was seven and neither one of them provided names, charges or any other details.

Wait a Minute…Turns Out There Is Footage

The story keeps evolving as Trump Administration officials think of new lies to tell and find new reporters to tell them to and turns out the Park Police have now posted a video which the AP described as a “grainy 30-second video” which appears to show a person kneeling by the water, reaching into the Pool and removing something. It doesn’t show anyone slicing the lining or throwing fence posts into the Pool, it just shows someone kneeling by the Pool and taking something out of the water which seems to be close enough for government work.

Park Police asked for help in identifying the individual and maybe you can help:

Today’s Lesson

Every time I was allowed “inside” an organization, my main impression was how disorganized the organizations actually were and right now we’re seeing how badly the Trump Administration is handling repairing a fucking wading pool, so what makes you think they’re any more efficient when it comes to waging a war or fixing the economy?

The main difference is the Reflecting Cesspool fiasco is being played out, step-by-step in public and those other issues are being dealt with in private and they only let us know what they want us to know, but anyone can walk up to the Reflecting Pool and see how badly they screwed it up.

Oh, wait…you can’t.

Because the Trump Administration has now put a fence up around the pool and claimed they were doing it for July 4^th and just got an early jump on things which sounds about as likely as the war with Iran lasting four-to-six weeks. If you want to read about all the other lies Trump has told about the Reflecting Pool screw-up, here you go:

https://www.factcheck.org/2026/06/trumps-unsupported-claims-about-reflection-pool-vandalism/

Okey-dokey.

This essay clearly got away from me and because they keep changing their story it took a lot of writing to explain one cartoon. I’ll post the rest of this week’s cartoons over the weekend and until then you might want to think about what happens when you elect a well-know liar, cheater, and convicted felon president.

Reflect on that.

http://kingfeatures.com/comics/editorial-cartoons-a-z/